It was 7.00am on a chill October morning in Commercial Street Whitechapel. Intrepid crime-busting duo, Bat Can and Rob Tin, were in a state of high vigilance on one of the top shelves at Dipak Patel’s Asian Goods Convenience Store, keenly aware that a number of break-ins and assaults had occurred in the area recently.
As Mr Patel was filling shelves at the rear of the store, two men wearing dark hoodies entered and began wandering through the aisles. Bat Can noticed that one of the men had what looked like the handle of a baseball bat protruding from his sleeve.
With every sinew straining to breaking point, and with their nerves stretched taut as piano wire, the crime-fighting duo looked on as one of the men suddenly dashed to the till and began emptying the takings into a holdall, while his partner with the bat seized Mr Patel by the throat and dealt him a blow on the head with the weapon.
Realising that every split-second was vital and that Mr Patel’s life could be at stake, Bat Can and his youthful ward prepared to spring into crime-fighting action.
Unfortunately, due to the fact that they’re tins of beans, they had to remain inert on their shelf and look on helplessly as the raiders made off with their loot, leaving MrPatel unconscious and bleeding heavily on the floor.
NEXT WEEK: The crime-busters of pressed steel are totally unable to stop the theft of a packet of Walker’s Crisps by a homeless woman and are completely powerless to help a Community Police Officer break up a Saturday night altercation between two drunks inside the shop.