Retailers of fish and chips in London have reported that there has been no change in their sales figures following yesterday’s terror attack on Westminster which has left 4 people dead and 40 injured.
A Whitechapel Whelk reporter spoke to the owner of one outlet, Greasy Del’s Traditional Fish & Chips, in Pimlico, just a stones throw from yesterday’s murderous attack:
“It’s business as usual here son. Why wouldn’t it be?
“Things did go a bit quieter than normal during that kerfuffle up the road but I put that down to the police road blocks mate.
“Terrible business really, but you don’t like to grumble at the end of the day do you?. At least the boys in blue shot the bugger”
“Now, can I get you anything? The rock salmon’s absolutely blinding this week. I’ll even throw in a pickled egg if you order large chips”
In other related news; thousands of Londoners have been spotted trudging to work in and around Westminster this morning, looking just as sullen and utterly pissed off at the prospect as ever.