robot girl
On the cyber. Mr Dell’s robot wife pictured shortly after their wedding

 

A 54-year-old Whitechapel man who built and married a robot woman has reportedly filed for divorce after discovering his new bride in a steamy clinch with his Dyson hoover.

Toby Dell, a full-time inventor, told reporters: “We’d only been married for 2 weeks when I stumbled on her having sex with the hoover.

“They were rolling around in front of the log fire, she was completely naked and laying on top of the hoover which was switched on at the time.

“She obviously hadn’t heard me come in because of the noise from the electric motor and jumped up quickly when I cried out.

“She tried to make out she’d fallen on top of the hoover while she’d been doing the lounge carpet, but it was obvious what they had been up to.

“I felt sick and betrayed to be honest. Now, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to trust a robot woman again. I’ll probably try to get a real one now, either that or I’ll turn gay. I know that’s a bit risky in Whitechapel but anything’s better than being cuckolded by a robot”

This news comes just two months after the husband of a cleaning lady at the BBC divorced his wife of 27 years after catching her giving oral relief to one of the Daleks out of Dr Who.

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