harrison
Hands Hole Oh! Ford poses for snappers last night before having people nailed to him

In a surprise move, Hollywood legend, Harrison Ford, has told friends that he will be tackling his toughest ever role this Easter when he will double as a ‘human cross’ and invite people to be nailed to him outside his home in Palm Beach, Florida.

Ford told reporters last night: “I’ve always been a deeply religious man, so what better way to express my faith than to pretend to be a cross and to have members of the public nailed to me outside my home”

The Star Wars actor plans to be driven two feet into the ground where he will adopt a ‘crucifix’ pose, similar to that of a scarecrow in a field.

People will then be nailed to the actor for short periods, after which, they will be asked to put their loose change in a tin positioned at the star’s feet.

The move has attracted criticism from Christian church leaders, however, with The Archbishop of Canterbury calling it: “Exploitative and a blasphemous outrage”. While The Pope urged people to boycott what he called the actor’s “cynical attempt to cash in on Christ’s suffering.”

“I know his acting is pretty wooden, even at the best of times,” he said last night, “But this is just taking the piss”

Ford’s announcement mirrors a similar move by Oscar-winning actress, Meryl Streep, who, last Easter Monday, had herself fired into space attached to a rocket in what she claimed was a tribute to Jesus’s ascension to Heaven.

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