If you’ve unearthed human remains in your back garden or on your allotment, the chances are that the previous occupants were murderers.
However, on the off-chance that they are the remains of a caveman or similar, contact, The British Museum in London, or email: DemDryBones@hotmail.com for the chance of a few quid plus an opportunity to appear in the local newspaper, holding your find and looking like a complete twat
We are a small, but perfectly formed band of satirists and smudge artists. We neither drink nor smoke. Nor indeed, do we use profanity or indulge in the sinful pleasures of the flesh. Now if you'll excuse me I need to get down the pub before closing time for a few pints and half an ounce of Golden Virginia. Hopefully, I'll have enough cash left to visit the local rub 'n' tug shop later for a massage and a rattling good bunk up with a painted floozie.
All The Best.
Danny SoZ.
Editor-in-chief
The Whitechapel Whelk 
September 21, 2018 at 4:15 am
Off to dig up the back garden right now!
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September 21, 2018 at 5:29 am
That’s the old entrepreneurial spirit!
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September 21, 2018 at 7:04 am
What it it was me? I can’t remember everything and you know how annoying people are – there’s probably a few down there.
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September 21, 2018 at 8:01 am
Get digging my friend. There’s gold in them thar bones!
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September 21, 2018 at 11:01 am
odds are high
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September 21, 2018 at 4:19 pm
Not at MY bookmakers they aint! 😦
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September 21, 2018 at 3:16 pm
One of PC Stupor’s distant cousins?
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September 21, 2018 at 4:20 pm
Could be. He’s got that same glazed expression
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October 4, 2018 at 6:26 pm
If the hat fits wear it. Or is it if a shoe…Whatever.
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