susanna

In what many are seeing as a surprise move, the Roman Catholic church last night announced that the Good Morning Britain tv show presenter, Susanna Reid, is to be beatified and then canonised as a saint in recognition of the suffering she has endured since 2014 when she was joined on the sofa by motor-mouthed irritant, Piers Morgan, following the retirement of show stalwart, Bill Turnbull

A spokesman for The Holy See in Rome told newsmen: “Our sister in Christ, Susanna, has suffered cruelly during her stint with Morgan, and in view of this, The Holy Father has seen fit to put her forward for sainthood in recognition of her long and psychologically painful ordeal.

“Quite how she stops herself from shooting the man in the face is beyond me, and now the church feels she deserves to be worshipped and revered for eternity in recognition of her forbearance and restraint.

“If she is accepted by The Holy See she will become, Saint Susanna of Southwark which is where the show is broadcast from”

Reid will now have to satisfy the church that she has performed a verifiable miracle in order that canonisation can take place.

It is understood that she may point to the time when Morgan had a go at climate change activist Greta Thunberg for being autistic and she restrained herself from booting him in the gonads.