anvil

Journalist and broadcaster, Emily Maitlis, had a narrow escape yesterday when a blacksmith’s anvil crashed to the ground, missing her head by inches, as she was leaving her office at the BBC headquarters in Portland Place, West London.

Police quickly arrived on the scene and began a search on the roof of the building where they found Prince Andrew crouching behind a lift shaft.

The troubled royal was then arrested and led away by armed officers before being taken to nearby Ebury Bridge police station where he is being held in police custody on suspicion of attempted murder.

Speculation is rife that Andrew may have been seeking revenge on the journalist after his disastrous televised interview in December 2019, when he denied having illicit sex with a minor by claiming that he was in a pizza parlour with his children when the alleged assault had taken place.

One eye witness to the arrest was forklift truck driver, Toby Dell, 27, from East London, who told reporters: “I saw two coppers dragging Prince Andrew towards the police car and bundling him into the back.

“He was effing and blinding and shouting the odds about being above the law and that he was going to tell The Queen if they didn’t let him go.

“I caught a glimpse of him as the motor sped past. and I have to say, that if what he says about being incapable of sweating is true, then somebody must have thrown a bucket of water over his swede because he was absolutely dripping”

Maitlis was shaken but unharmed following the incident and told reporters: “I knew he was a slippery little bastard but I didn’t expect this one”

In an ironic twist, if the Duke of York is found guilty, he will serve time in one of Her Majesty’s prisons, often referred to by inmates as, The Windsor Hotel.