US President, Donald Trump, has made the astonishing claim that for the past three weeks he has been treating a fungal infection between his toes by pouring boiling horse liniment into both his ears.
“It’s pretty painful I have to tell you,” he told newsmen at a briefing last night. “In fact, I have to ask Melania to do it for me while I bite down on a piece of wood, but I have to say, she’s been more than happy to help and even insists on doing it twice to be on the safe side.
“So far there’s been no improvement but I’ve been told by my tremendous advisor, Dr Anthony Fauci, who’s a great guy, by the way, to keep going and that it often takes around six months to take effect.
“I mean to say, if it can work on something as big as a horse it has to work on humans too, right?”
A spokesman for the American health department said last night. “Horse linament is only efficacious when treating strains and minor muscle tears in horses.
“If the president persists with this practice it will undoubtedly kill him but don’t tell him I said that.
“I guess it’s slightly better than mainlining drain cleaner but there ain’t really much in it”
Trump attracted further criticism yesterday when he blamed former president, Barack Obama, for a recent spate of molehill damage to his golf course at Mar A Lago.