bbc

In what is being hailed as a major coup for the channel, the BBC last night announced that they have tabled a successful bid to screen England soccer boss Gareth Southgate’s wife preparing the children’s tea prior to matches in the forthcoming 2022 World Cup tournament in Qatar.

It is believed that they offered in excess of twenty-five pounds of licence payer’s money to live screen Mrs Southgate preparing the 5.00 pm meal.

She will be shown undertaking a number of tasks, which will include defrosting quick and easy meals for the kids like turkey twizzlers or frozen pizzas and putting them in the oven before pouring out their Vimto cold drinks to wash it down with.

A spokesman for the Beeb said last night: ‘We’re extremely excited about this project which will bring all the action live and direct from Mrs Southgate’s kitchen.

‘We’re hoping to use a number of our commentary team and studio analysts throughout the meal preparation, including, Gary Lineker, Roy Keane, and Mark Lawrenson, plus a token female that most men will baulk at and not take in the least bit seriously’

It is understood that the cameras will be switched off if any controversial incidents, such as food-throwing, swearing at the kids by Mrs Southgate or vomiting at the table take place as the action unfolds.

This announcement comes just a week after rivals, ITV, announced that they have made a successful bid to screen edited highlights of the England team bus driver checking his tyre pressures before setting off with the lads to the stadium.