Pop entrepreneur and Britain’s Got Talent panellist, Simon Cowell, has announced that he has been so affected by the plight of the beleaguered civilian population in war-torn Gaza he is going to set up a refugee camp on his massive, botoxed forehead in a bid to alleviate their suffering.
Cowell, 95, told newsmen: ‘Along with everybody else with an ounce of decency, I’m sickened by the genocidal actions of the Israeli government against the civilians in Gaza and I intend to set up a camp on my gigantic, spam forehead that will hopefully provide shelter for many stricken families.’
It is estimated that well in excess of twenty thousand people will fit comfortably on Cowell’s spam. They will then be fed and watered by around 500 aid trucks which will be loaded with provisions from inside his ridiculous, high-waisted, clown trousers.
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